Thursday, 12 February 2009

Paying Respects to my aunt .. Churchyard visit ..

My mother had exhausted herself and slept through yesterday! When I went through she admitted she'd worn herself .. I do wish I knew how the brain worked - her condition seems to be completely different to most other patients with strokes.

We had a lovely sunny day, without the snow or icy paths & so I was able to take my uncle to his wife's grave at the Church and lay some flowers for her .. my mother always asks about my uncle .. they were married to brother and sister - so no relation to each other as such. We had a good lunch .. I took pheasant and all the veg, and we had roast pheasant - which cooked while we were up at the Church and then left him a treat for the evening - prawn cocktail and a chocolate trifle .. he was very grateful, as he loves his food!!

My uncle was in the room next to my Ma over Christmas of 2007/8 as he'd fractured his hip and had other complications. During that 4 months I lived in his house and travelled to the hospital/s, visited my mother and at times went to my own house!! Anyway he's home safe and sound .. & we installed an outside platform lift, as the house is off the ground, and put in a disabled bathroom - so he's set for the future .. he already had a stair lift. He enjoys the stories I share with my mother .. and is very good at supporting her with cards and notes.

He needs support & we work together .. I'd like to be free .. but at times in life it's just not possible and I think how would I like to be treated in their situations? .. I'm tired, at times exhausted, but so many others are so much worse off than any of the three of us .. and if I can bring some light and laughter into my elders' lives and pass that on to others .. via my positive letters and positive stories .. that's such a plus to all: our relatives and friends also enjoy my long updates & comment on their positivity & informative nature = it supports me too!

8 comments:

Shaw said...

Hello Hilary. I completely agree with you that give positive attitude, thinking, and posture is not for others but for ourselves. My father had totally different symptons from any other diabetic patients. So I know how you feel about your mother. I love your keeping being happy and being positive. Thank you for your heartfelt story.

Shaw Funami
Fill the Missing Link

Stella Stopfer said...

Freedom comes in many forms, has many different meanings for different people. But, most of all, freedom is happiness. Sometimes you can't do it all, even if you want to; other times it just doesn't feel right. And it's ok because we can make someone happy, bring some joy into their life but how they really feel doesn't depend on you, it depends on them. Don't forget that you are you first, don't forget to make yourself happy...even if that means just resting a bit.
Take care and lots of love to you, your mom and your uncle...

Marketing Unscrambled, learn to earn 14 said...

Hilary, they are happy to have such a sweetheart like you to watch over them and help them as much as you can.Have a good day with laughter and joy in it.
Dan and Deanna "Marketing Unscrambled"

Hilary Melton-Butcher said...

Hi Shaw - thank you for your concern .. and it is so nice to have friends like you who are providing me with support too.

Hilary - Be Positive Be Happy

Hilary Melton-Butcher said...

Thank you Stella - I really appreciate your comments on freedom .. and the understanding that at times in life we just have to do the best we can to help those bedridden, or who can't get out due to old age symptoms.
Thanks for your love for us all - Hilary: Be Positive Be Happy

Hilary Melton-Butcher said...

Hi Dan and Deanna .. it makes life happy for us all and laughter is so important -
thank you for your support - Hilary Be Positive Be Happy

Believe Achieve - Hugo and Roxanne said...

Hi Hilary,

You are an absolute blessing to all those you care for and come in contact with. You've remained positive through the toughest times and you share your positivity with all of us, too. Be sure to "fill your well", just as Giovanna reminded us how important this was to many of us. Doing so, allows us to give more of ourselves and feeds our happiness. I'd like to hear a Positive story about you soon...something you did to "fill your well." Look forward to reading more. :-)

Many Blessings....
Roxanne ~ Believe Achieve

Hilary Melton-Butcher said...

Hi Hugo and Roxanne .. thanks for that thought .. it's a tricky time as I'm the main stay .. and I can't see that changing .. & I won't push .. read on!!

Thanks to you to for always supporting me .. & keeping me 'up' - fortunately I'm true to my name .. Hilary = Happy .. & as it happens I am by nature positive .. & I've learnt to turn things around - so a negative is always a positive ..

Many Thanks - Hilary: Be Positive Be Happy